3 Subtle Signs You Might Be Dealing with a Narcissist at Work
Not every difficult person is a narcissist — but some people consistently drain your energy, manipulate perception, and make you question your own competence.
If you suspect you’re dealing with someone high in narcissistic traits at work, here are 3 subtle but telling signs — based on behavioural science and real-world dynamics.
Step 1: Watch How They React to Criticism or Feedback
A person with narcissistic tendencies may appear confident — until they’re challenged. Then, their reaction often shifts dramatically.
Look for: defensiveness, blaming others, or attacking the messenger when receiving even mild constructive feedback.
💡 Psychology insight: Narcissists have a fragile self-image under the surface. Criticism threatens that — so they deflect, deny, or devalue in return.
Step 2: Pay Attention to Who They Undermine (and When)
They may flatter people above them but subtly tear down colleagues or subordinates — especially those who are competent or confident.
Red flags: backhanded compliments, gossip, credit-stealing, or creating “us vs. them” dynamics within teams.
💡 Term for this: Narcissistic triangulation — playing people against each other to maintain control or status.
Step 3: Track How You Feel After Interactions
Sometimes, your body knows before your brain does. After meetings, check in with yourself:
- Do you feel drained or confused?
- Do you question your worth or competence?
- Do you feel like you can’t win, no matter how well you perform?
💡 Tip: This emotional exhaustion is common when dealing with covert manipulation or ego-driven dynamics. Your discomfort is data.
You don’t need a diagnosis to set a boundary.
You don’t need to prove someone is a narcissist to protect your energy. Observe the patterns. Stay grounded in facts. And always document interactions if needed.
Awareness is the first step. Boundaries are the next.